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Modeling a t-shirt my brother airbrushed for my sister who was going to the Price Is Right
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"Fun-seeking, animal loving, slightly psychic, drunk. Prone to belting out old Carly Simon hits at karaoke bars and only..."
More about Heather
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More About Heather
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Occupation:
Comic/Mischief Maker
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Hobbies and Interests:
reading, writing, gardening, drinking, laughing, singing, removing shirt, jumping on backyard trampoline, passing out, waking up and saying "Why am I naked on the trampoline? Again?"
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Favorite Books:
The Princess Bride by William Goldman, Eyes of the Dragon by Stephen King, anything by Lynda Barry, Nick Hornby, Roald Dahl, David Sedaris, Jennifer Belle, Carl Hiassen, Anne Rice, Judy Blume, and of course, the Harry Potter series. + Memoirs of a Geisha
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Favorite Movies:
In no particular order: The Princess Bride, Forrest Gump, Some Like It Hot, Kill Bill, Amelie, Willy Wonka, Arthur, Old School, and certain scary movies like Silence of the Lambs, The Ring (yikes!), The Sixth Sense, and Signs
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Favorite Music:
Ani DiFranco, Jeff Buckley, Jason Falkner, David Gray, Brad, Radiohead, Tori Amos, Prince, Madonna
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Favorite TV Shows:
Simpsons, Friends, Malcolm in the Middle, Scrubs, Sopranos, Sex and the City, Nip/Tuck, Sesame Street, and I never tire of Three's Company
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Zodiac Sign:
Capricorn
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About Me:
Fun-seeking, animal loving, slightly psychic, drunk. Prone to belting out old Carly Simon hits at karaoke bars and only missing a couple of notes. Proud mama of three cats and I will punch you if you say you don't like cats. Hard. I have an adorable husband who encourages me to get up to no good with drunk girls. Also, I make an excellent Bloody Mary, and I have a big butt. And I can't stop doing the whistle from Kill Bill.
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Who I Want to Meet:
Mister Rogers. Koko, the sign language gorilla. Cute girls who will show me their boobs. Someone who enjoys doing/hearing the whistle from Kill Bill. Someone fun and funny, who knows a good time when they see
it. Someone able to fly by the seat of their pants when
the moment hits, and who knows when the pants need to just
stay seated. People who have been told they are weird, and have taken it as a compliment. If you have ever used the term conservative to describe yourself, please fuck off.
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Testimonials and Comments for Heather
How dare you think that you are better
cooler nicer kinder more giving sweeter
smarter more beautiful. Did you come up
with this line.
Great Clips slogan is "How can we make
your hair look great today?"
DON'T FUCKING TOUCH IT!
That's really funny even if Great Clips
no longer uses that as the crappy
service based hair ruining company slogan.
So again if you are reading this and you
are not Heather - one more time -
Heather rules losers drool. I will love
Heather forever and will always greet
her with a smile and a wave and whatever
pocket change I may have. What can I
say the girl loves video games and
washing clothes. So in closing "Feeling
fine in '89" Love - corkel ( I hate the
actual nickname corkel but, since
Heather gave it to me I pretend I love
it ) thank you
Heather's occupation: Comic/mischief
maker. Ahh, ladies and gents, the world
needs more people like Heather.
is first of all HILARIOUS! and second
she is one of the nicest, most fun
people I know. Who else's wedding can
you make out with the majority of the
bridesmaids? Good times good times. I
still think it should be Tits Magee.
"Koko, who's the most interesting
celebrity you've ever f**ked?"
Obviously, it's Stacy Keach. As for
Heather: she's not a celebrity so
much as a woman-about-town.
Besides which, the thirteen days we
spent aboard the QE2 were strictly
platonic. Mostly we sipped cointreau
on the lido deck and picked mites
out of each other's fur. You know --
girl shit.
to describe heather, but that's because
she spends most of her time in junior
high schools in the late 80s. why would
she hang out in a junior high school,
you might ask. or how did she get back
to the late 80s, you might query. hey,
stop asking so many questions before i
hit you in the head with a trapper
keeper, you dweeb.
not? She is funny, smart, beautiful,
and loves girls! We wake up almost
every morning giggling and fall asleep
(pass out) each night laughing. When
you are around her, good times MUST be
had. If good times are happening,
there is a good chance her top is
commin' off and she is going to try and
fuck your girlfriend. I love her so
much.
Heather the hell away from it or you
will end up watching the Women's Home
Underwear and Smut Novel Shopping
Network.
that's always down for fun and
adventure. Heather likes to mix it up,
the drinks, and the party. I just wish
she lived a couple miles closer!