Just looking around

Aug 2003

Valley

The Man

http://profiles.friendster.com/1577662

van Nuys Senior High, Attended 1994 - 1997, Class of 1997

UCLA

University of California - Los Angeles, Attended 1997 - 2004, Class of 2004, Bachelor's Degree, Waste of Time

Aspiring Bum

Church of Sighentology...

I like to never do anything. Instead I create intricate lies to use as excuses to explain why I am unable to do anything. Just trying to exercise my right hemisphere.

I like books that have simple words and exciting plots. I should like books that make me fall asleep and read dictionaries, but they make me fall asleep and read dictionaries. Why try?

Every movie ever made.

Rhymesayers, Definitive Jux, Visionaries, Hiero, LL, De La, Tribe, KRS, Sage, Jean, Subtitle, Prefuse, Amon, The Faint, Mars Volta, Esthero, Bright Eyes, White Stripes, Tv on the Radio, HBMS, Pharcyde, Madlib, K-os, The Streets, MIA, etc.

Anything on HBO... and skinemax.

I was born to a noble British Family in 1979. My father, Gene Chandler, was the Duke of Earl and he later moved the family to Cypress Hill in Wales.
For my 1st birthday, my mother and father decided to take a cruise and due to poor navigation were stranded on an deserted tropical island. They tried to do their best to survive, but were far from able to survive on their own without tea and East Indians as slaves. They finally found a large pile of bananas in front of a giant tree and began to feed their famished faces. They were ransacked and beaten to death by angry gorillas who had caught them eating the offering they had given their gorilla tree god. Then a giant bananasaur came out of nowhere and ate all the gorillas for letting the stupid humans eat all of it's children.
This bananasaur raised me for 17 years of my life until both of us were captured by some English pirates who had come upon the island. They brought the only father I remember back to the original Island of my birth and stuck him in a cage for all to see while I had to clean the cages of all the pirates other prisoners.
Once the tickets stopped selling, they made him into the world's largest banana cream pie so they could collect the royalties from Guinness' Book of Records. I was forced to ingest my own father and I am disgusted with myself to this day for getting second and third slices of the pie. He was delicious and I was rarely fed, I could not help it.
I finally escaped one day, when the pirates were busy watching the Giant Snake try and get in the Burning Bush and caught the first boat I could to America, the Land of Opportunity.
I presently work as a civil rights activist for the liberation of bananas. If you would like to donate to the foundation, please e-mail me. And next time you laugh when a cartoon character slips on a banana peel, remember that some bananasaur just lost a child so you could get your cheap laugh.

My future therapist and people who enjoy mental abuse.