Hey baby. Well you're a... a sassafras beignet. That's right, I'm stealin another of your jokes. And who was it that said, "I don't have time for clowns"? You! You said it. Well I have time for you, let's get simple together. Oh, and your prowess.
Calls from Buddy are the BEST. He
does impressions, he cackles, and he
acts like a major dork. Buddy is willing
to act like a thirteen-year old with me.
He will even record messages for my
outgoing message. Buddy, will you
please record another Sean Connery
message ("If that's a confession, my
ass is a banjo.") on my OGM?
NOTICE TO ALL OF BUDDY'S FRIENDS:
The best way to get Buddy to call you back
within a months time is to continually buy his
art on a payment plan (which he will
ALWAYS do.) As long as money is coming
his way, his ear is soon to follow, and your
phone will ring!
Cautionary note: Only do this if you WANT a
call from Buddy. Procede with caution!
Buddy is my favorite the family. His
brothers Pally and Chummy aren't
quite as funny, although they are
more punctual. Also, he makes
Probes look good.
You call that an impression? If that's
an impression, my ass is a banjo!
Oh wait - hmmm. Think I screwed that
up!
I'm so glad I found you on Friendster!
Buddy and I were good friends when he
lived here in Dullass Texas and I
totally miss hanging out with him - I
called him once to see if he was still
on the planet and he called me back
later and I was kind of drunk and
probably said REALLY stupid things (and
the ex that I think is dead because he
won't return my phone calls still
hasn't returned my phone calls - FYI) -
Buddy is very fun to be with,
intelligent, and often times profound -
(it's hard to say nice things in a
testimonial without imagining him
making some sort of joke about it!)
He's one of those excellent
conversationalists who can go from
Schopenhauer to bellybuttons in one
breath (at least if I remember
correctly). I dig his art, writing,
and cartoons! He be SWEET DAWG!
I have taken my time to write this
testimonial because Buddy is one of my
favorite people in the whole wide
world and I had to let it marinate.
Meaning I had to get real drunk. Oh,
don't get so uptight -- I'm kidding.
First of all, he listed T.C. Boyle
*and* Office Space *AND* Trust ... um,
I don't know who J.P. Donleavy is ...
OK, so let's move on. If I could give
Buddy an award, he would get it for
Best Impression of Sean Connery. Oh,
and Best Impression of Jack Nicholson
in Five Easy Pieces. Yeah. Those are
the ones I get down on my hands and
knees and beg for when it's late and
we've had too much to drink. Or, come
to think of it, anytime, really. Now
for the history. I have known Buddy
(not his real name) for something like
14 years. He will deny it, because he
likes to tell people he is not of
legal drinking age, but yes, it's been
14 years. He will make you laugh so
hard, you might have an aneurysm. But
you will thank him for it in the
morning. He even likes to go shopping
at IKEA, as long as you ply him with
chocolate. In summation, Buddy is one
of my very best friends and I think he
would make a really good boyfriend.
does impressions, he cackles, and he
acts like a major dork. Buddy is willing
to act like a thirteen-year old with me.
He will even record messages for my
outgoing message. Buddy, will you
please record another Sean Connery
message ("If that's a confession, my
ass is a banjo.") on my OGM?
The best way to get Buddy to call you back
within a months time is to continually buy his
art on a payment plan (which he will
ALWAYS do.) As long as money is coming
his way, his ear is soon to follow, and your
phone will ring!
Cautionary note: Only do this if you WANT a
call from Buddy. Procede with caution!
brothers Pally and Chummy aren't
quite as funny, although they are
more punctual. Also, he makes
Probes look good.
you dude.
an impression, my ass is a banjo!
Oh wait - hmmm. Think I screwed that
up!
I'm so glad I found you on Friendster!
Buddy and I were good friends when he
lived here in Dullass Texas and I
totally miss hanging out with him - I
called him once to see if he was still
on the planet and he called me back
later and I was kind of drunk and
probably said REALLY stupid things (and
the ex that I think is dead because he
won't return my phone calls still
hasn't returned my phone calls - FYI) -
Buddy is very fun to be with,
intelligent, and often times profound -
(it's hard to say nice things in a
testimonial without imagining him
making some sort of joke about it!)
He's one of those excellent
conversationalists who can go from
Schopenhauer to bellybuttons in one
breath (at least if I remember
correctly). I dig his art, writing,
and cartoons! He be SWEET DAWG!
testimonial because Buddy is one of my
favorite people in the whole wide
world and I had to let it marinate.
Meaning I had to get real drunk. Oh,
don't get so uptight -- I'm kidding.
First of all, he listed T.C. Boyle
*and* Office Space *AND* Trust ... um,
I don't know who J.P. Donleavy is ...
OK, so let's move on. If I could give
Buddy an award, he would get it for
Best Impression of Sean Connery. Oh,
and Best Impression of Jack Nicholson
in Five Easy Pieces. Yeah. Those are
the ones I get down on my hands and
knees and beg for when it's late and
we've had too much to drink. Or, come
to think of it, anytime, really. Now
for the history. I have known Buddy
(not his real name) for something like
14 years. He will deny it, because he
likes to tell people he is not of
legal drinking age, but yes, it's been
14 years. He will make you laugh so
hard, you might have an aneurysm. But
you will thank him for it in the
morning. He even likes to go shopping
at IKEA, as long as you ply him with
chocolate. In summation, Buddy is one
of my very best friends and I think he
would make a really good boyfriend.