Jay

Quality Engineer

Music, Sports, Movies, Travel, Beer, Sex, Homer, Surfing, Dolphins, He-Man, Nerf, Atari

Nice Guys Don't Get Laid, Cosmos, Bartending for Dummies, Daddy's Boy, Eye of the Dragon, Garfield Vol. 4

Cabin Boy, The Big Lebowski, Army of Darkness, Caveman, Smokey and the Bandit, Zorro the Gay Blade, Black Belt Jones, Indiana Jones, Star Wars, Kingpin, Kevin Smith (movies), Resevor Dogs, Porky's, 8 mile, Kill Bill, Mel Brooks, Princess Bride, CB4

Alkaline Trio, NOFX, Sick of It All, Jawbreaker, Hum, Mars Volta, Common Rider, Weezer, Reggie & the Full Effect, at the drive in, Get Up Kids, Def Leppard, The Fla Flas, Cracker, J Church, Modest Mouse, Built to Spill, Propagandhi, Ween, 80s, 311

Get A Life, Threes Company, Tom and Jerry, Simpsons, Sapranos, X-Files, Reno 911, Insomniac, South Park, Cheers, Bosom Buddies, V, Snorks, The Man Show, Oprah, Alf, SNL, Family Ties

I havent updated this thing in a long time ok ever. The first one was done like a year ago while I was drunk. I just copied and pasted from my friendster account. Ill paste it to a journal or something for old time sakes. I dont know where to start Im not very conceded and find it hard to talk about myself. Other than the fact that Im hot as hell! Im Fuckin fine just look at me hell yeah just wait till l I get the shirtless pic of me standing next to my tricked out Ford Fiesta. You all will then be the luckiest people in the world unless you have seen me in person. Those people are truly blessed Ok no really Im just an average Joe with an average job unless you know what I do. Not really that proud of what I do because I have morals so Im looking for a new job. Anyone hiring Ill take 40,000 to start. Ill do what ever. Anyhow Im not a Republican or a Democrat. They both suck. But I bet you can guess what side I lean on. Im not very intellectual and not so much artsy but I love people who are. Except people who think they are when they isnt. Im a little bit of a Star Wars geek. I wasnt. It was dormant but lately its back. I have been known for my bootlegging of The Star Wars Holiday Special As you can tell I definitely dont give a fuck about being cool. . I like good beer most of the time. But I have to go ghetto sometimes and drink 40s in the back of my car just because I dont want to forget who I am. Plus it still makes me happy. I love you El Paso people! I have horrible writing skills but love to write. I have a passion for Chicken McNuggets more than I should. I would like to be a vegetarian but I dont like vegetables. I drink way to much coffee and Diet Mountain Dew everyday. I have a tendency too do stuff like this at work when Im feelin Office Spacey. Im not much of a boobie fan, really I think they are overrated. Im just randomly adding stuff incase you havent noticed. I go to shows when I can. I have respect for all life so I like to kid about being Hindu but no joke its a great religion. Really I respect almost all religions. But I am pretty much Agnostic because I have no clue what religion is correct. All I know is that I dont know nothing. Im a huge geek for standup comedy. I like dancing but mostly with myself while playing Huey Lewis and the News. I sing in the shower but only Phil Collins songswouldnt you agree baby you and me have a groovy kind of love? I know The Turtles did that. If you are still reading I think you should message me because Im freakin impressed. So Im stopping now....................................................................


OLD ABOUT ME:I'm the kind of guy who likes to take long walks on the
beach collecting hypodermic needles. I also enjoy
strolling through town peeing on things I like so everyone
knows it's my territory. I like my Whataburger with salad
dressing not mustard. I like porno but just regular stuff
not midget porn unless the midgets hot. I always keep an
optimistic outlook on life; when I think of all those poor
people in Ethiopia that don't have access to good porn. I
like cats come to find out their meat is very tender if
cooked slowly. I like walking around my house with nothing
on but my addidas. I like being naked but have a fear of
scorpions biting my toe. I like sex very much but just
cant
find anyone as hot as me to have it with. So I just keep
having it with myself. I'm from the hard streets of East
El Paso. I have spent many a glorious night scarfing down
10 to 20 Chicos tacos with that glorious processed cheese
and grade E meat (as drool drips down my chin). I live in
Phoenix now. I have to say the best thing about living
here is the 120-degree temperatures in the summer. It
keeps
the ladies in next to nothing. My favorite body part of a
woman is the clavicle. As the song goes " I want to wake
up
naked next to you kissing the curve of your clavicle.
That
other Jay-Z has
nothing on me. I'm medium pimping. I got like 20.00 on me
at all times. Yeah girl feel free to super size!

Looking for a girl who likes to watch E.T. and eat Cool
Ranch Doritos. I'm just looking for a wonderful girl that
will not just use me for sex. I'm sick and tired of all
these supermodels, cheerleaders, housewives and Uma
Thurman
just having sex with me and never leaving me a number. I
want a girl who will stop stealing all my stuff. I still
haven't found my remote control Jenni!! A girl who will
love me for me and my invisible friend Peter. Someone who
doesn't have a problem if I get a little in their hair.
Someone who will hold me when I'm scared. Nah I'm just playin' looking for a nice girl that wont be cruel.