Christopher's Photo Gallery
More About Christopher
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College/University:
Washington University in St. Louis, Attended - , Class of , Other
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Occupation:
Software Developer, Writer
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Affiliations:
narrowbooks.com
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Favorite Movies:
cemetery man, dirty Harry, revenge of the nerds
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Favorite Music:
Calvin Johnson, Mick Collins, Jack Oblivian, David Berman
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Favorite TV Shows:
pole position, spiderman (live action with Nicholas Hammond - great music!), turbo teen, kidd video
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Testimonials and Comments for Christopher
day at the hospital. Christopher was
lying in his hospital bed, flipping
through channels with a remote.
"Hey, Simon, he said. "Everyone's
been acting really weird around here.
The doctors will only whisper to each
other. They say I'm fine, but then why
can't I go home? Christopher
laughed nervously. "You guys would
tell me if something was wrong,
right? Like if I was dying? I felt a
lump grow in my throat. "Sure we
would, pal. Sure. Have some orange
juice. Christopher nodded at my
offer. "I mean, he said, sipping his
orange juice, "it's weird is all. I'm not
sick, you know? "Of course not, I
said, choking back tears. "You're
going to be fine. Just fine. I then
excused myself. I was barely able to
make it out into the hallway before I
broke down, weeping.
call everyone a "Wanker", we would
pass time time by doing a call and
response to Dead Kennedy's
songs...California...Uberalis...
Christopher was also the only
person excited when I once got an
advance copy of a Primus album. I
tried out to be the singer for his band
once, but I guess that my rendition of
"Dirty Boots" just not cool enough.
Rock on you wanker!
said to me, "There is something
wrong with you. I am not like you. Be
gone from me, wistful poodle-breath
numskull!" I was so taken aback by
this random act of unprovoked verbal
assault that I had no other recourse
than to wail away on a metal trash
can until it bled decomposed
vegetables. Then he said, "That's
rock and roll, man. Lets listen to the
Gibson Brothers and make prank
calls." We did. And now we are
friends.
friend Jason once and we kept getting
assaulted by a hilarious campaign of
prank phone calls. It was like some dude
in a sped-up voice kept requesting some
Frank Zappa song called: "Shove it up
your poop chute!" (or something). At
some point, it was revealed that it was
Christopher calling us and playing
prerecording messages at the wrong
speed. It was genious!
this man my fan. Because he doesn't
totally suck. But Christopher, you
gotta stop sending me those "fan books".
Frankly, they're starting to creep me out.
get the hell away from my Cool Ranch
Doritos! Get the fuck off them! Just
kidding. I'd never eat crap like that.
And neither would this fool. He'd rather
eat some edamame. And sock you in the
face. And then say sorry.