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Elizabeth

Female, 35, Single, Los Angeles, CAMore

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Testimonials and Comments for Elizabeth

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Alex
Posted
Oh Liz, there's nothing like, you know,
getting to know someone. I remember
when i first really got to know you, it
was at Rip Torn's 102nd birthday bash,
do you remember? Of course you do. I
was doing the wall flower thing and you
were doing the drinking thing and well
i can't say i was having a very good
time until Rip introduced us. You
smiled and pretended to hear my name.
The stink of O'Shanley's Irish Cream
wafting off you was intoxicating. Later
when i sidled up to you at the snack
table mentioned how good the dip was
you gave me the funniest look. I swear
i nearly crapped myself. It was like we
hadn't been introduced at all! But
that's what's so funny about you, you
take a joke all the way. Anyway later
in the bathroom when i accidently
walked in on you and that caterer
making-out that's when i think you took
it too far. Fernando was really hitting
me Liz! but oh well i guess i'm not the
first guy to bleed for comedy. I'll
never forget your soft dulcet cackle as
my red red blood soiled Fernie's white
tux jacket. I think i kept some of the
teeth i lost that night. I must have
them somewhere. Who knows, i can't find
anything after the move. Did i mention
i had to downsize apartments after the
lawsuit. Who ever heard of stalking
laws, anyway? Besides i really do
happen to walk the same way to work as
you, you know from the parking garage,
to my office which is in your apartment
building. And i swear, my cell phone is
dialing your number on its own. I'm
trying to call Dowling. Honest. But i
don't hold any of that against you. I
know its really that lawyer of yours.
He just wants you money, Lizzy, i'm
telling you. Call me, I'll read you
this "restraining order" thing he sent
me. Crazy. Seriously though have you
been getting my letters? I have to send
them to your manager now that you
changed apartments, and frankly i'm not
going to send sensitive material like
these little love notes to a PO Box. I
called Max (is that his name?) over
there at A&C managment but his
extension doesn't seem to be working...
still whatever, right. I gotta keep
trying? Gotta talk to my little red
headed fire cracker. xoxo Cruz. PS -
hung like a horse. YOU KNOW IT. jk lol -
in joke in da house. Say hi to
Frenie. how's his knuckles?

Erin
Posted
Liz is a master of the ancient Asian
self-defense technique called jujitsu.
All those times you've seen her
randomly fall down in the street were
just a ruse. She'll snap your neck in
two seconds flat. When she tells you
that she's going to "yoga" she really
means "intensive martial arts training"
and when she says she's shooting
a "Norman Lear thing" she really
means "acting as Jackie Chan's stunt
double." Liz is fierce. Seriously,
though, Liz is an amazing friend who
has gotten me through many a crisis
with her words of wisdom and support.
She's one of the most reliable and
freaking funny people I know. And when
I need a beer at the end of a long,
hard day, Liz is the first person I
call to join me. All hail Liz Hackett!

Andy
Posted
I once was travelling through Columbia
with Liz - the country's beauty only
rivaled by its poverty. We were
staying in a small village outside of
Cali on the Pacific coast. It was an
unusually hot afternoon and we were
sipping a couple of beers at a local
cafe. The humidity was enervating,
but in that good way and the beer was
bringing to a level of comfort neither
of us had felt since living in Los
Angeles. While waiting for the check
a couple of large SUV's came roaring
into frame and out jumper several
heavily armed men shouting in a
language neither one of us
understood. I cowered under the
table, but Liz knew exactly what to
do. She did a well-practiced roll-
dodge, into one of the men taking out
his legs knocking the very suprised
thug to the ground. Liz quickly
smashed her elbow into his face and
knocked him out. Before the other
paramilitaries knew what was going on
Liz was back on her feet - this time
holding two very large automatic
weapons. She flipped them her
trademark smile and began mowing down
the nonplussed quasi-soldiers.
Bullets, blood and guts were flying
everywhere - Liz being the architect
of this scene. After the last man was
put to sleep, she picked up her beer,
took a swig and told me it was safe to
come out from under the table.

This is why Liz rocks. Looking
forward to Pakistan!

Michael
Posted
Except for "The Incident", there is
nothing bad to be said of Liz. Her
epicurean knowledge of crackers is
amazing. She might have an easier time
with the Law if she confined her
navel-gazing to her own, but it's nice
to get out of the house every so often
to bail a friend out. She always gets
the first round on nights like these.
She's fun and saucy and I can honestly
say that I have never had a bad time in
her company.

Joey
Posted
I have one thing to say about Liz:
She's one good shag.

Hilary
Posted
You would imagine Liz and I are
attached at the hip since we're writing
partners. But I'll let you in on a
little secret...it's our love of MONKEY
MOVIES that bind us for life! Liz is
awesome, and we loooooove her.

Angry Marge
Posted
Liz is one of my bitches. You know how
we all have a group of bitches? Well
Liz is one of mine. I love this Ho. We
sued to live together in the guest
house of Captain Mauser from Police
Academy 2. Evetry morning Liz would
sneak into the mainhouse while Mauser
was taking a shower and replace his
shampoo with glue. and then he'd run
around the house naked with his hands
glued to his head yelling MAHONEY!!!!
Liz is really really funny. Gentleman
you should get to know her, if you
don't I might cut you with my razor.
Liz is msart and successful and her
favorite food is beer. Oh and she is
the most fun of my bitches.

Maha
Posted
liz is even more beautiful in person.
and though she is ridiculously well
adjusted, she is soooo funny, she makes
me pee in my pants which is so
inconvenient - i have to change my
pants a lot. she is a super talented
successful writer and i'm her agent - i
know these things. she is fun, fun,
fun. you should check out her comedy
troupe. you too will pee in your pants.

Tim
Posted
LIZ IS MAYBE THE GREATEST WOMAN EVER.
We have known each other since freshman
year at USC. She never fails to make me
laugh. or make me...wily. I don't know
what that means. You should get to know
Liz and aks her interesting questions
like: what was it like having Captain
mauser from Police Academy 2 as your
landlord.

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