kelli kelli...you sassy sexy gurl...hope you still remember me? in fact, kelli is probably the only authentic east coast friend i made in the 3 years i lived in cambridge/boston. a bottle of moscato she recommended..i was hooked...sure enough i was a goner. she's one smooth vixen....(kelli--help!! can't remember the name of the moscato...it's nowhere to be found on the west coast!!!)
Posted
Kelli is a great rock and roll songwriter; just don't tell her.
Sorry I haven't sent those condoms yet. But I
hear you're as dry as that cracked, barren
Texas soil. Accidental pregnancy shouldn't be
much of a problem in your condition. It's that
wet Boston spring that I'm worried about now.
Give me your mailing address so I can FedEx
those autographed condoms (with certificate of
authenticity and photo of me signing them).
Remember: don't get knocked up until you're
married and depressed.
The last time I saw Kelli, years ago and
after not seeing her for very many years,
she had a brand new hat. She forgot
her hat at my apartment and I saved it
faithfully in my boyfriend's closet until the
next time I saw her. I moved, and
returned it to it's waiting spot in his
closet. Then when I moved away from
him and out of state, I left it in his closet.
So you know who has your hat!!!
Kelli and I used to ride the same bus. Kelli
would always sit with this girl named Kelly
who was not an eighth as cool as Kelli was
but they had been childhood friends and
Kelli was not one to cast away old friends
lightly. One day, Kelli and Kelly got into a
fight because Kelly is a stupid bitch (unlike
Kelli) and Kelli sat with me on the bus! Even
though I was the new girl in town and didn't
own a Hypercolor sweatshirt and know how
to tight-roll my jeans, Kelli didn't seem to
mind as she too was eschewing these inane
cultural trends. Soon we became friends
and my life has forever been better for it.
Kelli knows more about wine than my cat
knows about fleas.
Kelli can shop talk indie rock with the best of
the williamsburg hipsters, but why would
she ever bother?
And finally, she shares her birthday with
Elvis. What more proof do you need that
Kelli rocks!
Testimonials and Comments for Kelli
hear you're as dry as that cracked, barren
Texas soil. Accidental pregnancy shouldn't be
much of a problem in your condition. It's that
wet Boston spring that I'm worried about now.
those autographed condoms (with certificate of
authenticity and photo of me signing them).
Remember: don't get knocked up until you're
married and depressed.
after not seeing her for very many years,
she had a brand new hat. She forgot
her hat at my apartment and I saved it
faithfully in my boyfriend's closet until the
next time I saw her. I moved, and
returned it to it's waiting spot in his
closet. Then when I moved away from
him and out of state, I left it in his closet.
So you know who has your hat!!!
would always sit with this girl named Kelly
who was not an eighth as cool as Kelli was
but they had been childhood friends and
Kelli was not one to cast away old friends
lightly. One day, Kelli and Kelly got into a
fight because Kelly is a stupid bitch (unlike
Kelli) and Kelli sat with me on the bus! Even
though I was the new girl in town and didn't
own a Hypercolor sweatshirt and know how
to tight-roll my jeans, Kelli didn't seem to
mind as she too was eschewing these inane
cultural trends. Soon we became friends
and my life has forever been better for it.
Kelli knows more about wine than my cat
knows about fleas.
Kelli can shop talk indie rock with the best of
the williamsburg hipsters, but why would
she ever bother?
And finally, she shares her birthday with
Elvis. What more proof do you need that
Kelli rocks!