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miss botswana, man?
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"i recently served as a speech and poise consultant to the newly crowned miss botswana (read of my exploits at..."
More about Steve
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Schools (Other):
University of Florida (currently), Notre Dame (back in the day)
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Occupation:
graduate student/fulbright gadabout
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Hobbies and Interests:
inventing poop jokes, interneting, taco bell, causing a scene, taunting the weak and mocking the strong, studying the micropolitics and technologies of power and democracy in Gaborone, Botswana
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Favorite Books:
journey to the end of the night, the man with the golden arm, neuromancer, blood meridian, grapes of wrath, cuckoo's nest, fear and loathing in las vegas, geek love, confederacy of dunces
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Favorite Movies:
the big lebowski, platoon, rushmore, royal tenenbaums, ET, the road warrior, star wars, UHF, the limey, the maltese falcon, miller's crossing, pee wee's big adventure, LOTR, almost famous
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Favorite Music:
radiohead, the clash, interpol, the strokes, dylan, neil young, weird al, sex pistols, journey
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Favorite TV Shows:
simpsons, seinfeld, x-files, curb your enthusiasm, daily show, late night with conan o'brien, the office (the british version)
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Zodiac Sign:
Sagittarius
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About Me:
i recently served as a speech and poise consultant to the newly crowned miss botswana (read of my exploits at fifthstreetreview.com) ; i like monkeys and fetuses and sparkling conversation; i am quite possibly the loudest person you've ever heard; i am considered by some to be a minor hair celebrity.
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Who I Want to Meet:
someone who will be as dazzled by me as i am by me.
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steve brought laughter and joy to us here in botswana, quickly becoming the 6th most famous person in the country. as well as coaching the former ms botswana al the way to the crown (after which she promptly stopped calling him until her prizes were reposessed and she was flat broke)
steve, we the people of botswana love and miss you. we will leave the porch light at the gabs sun on. just incase...
continues to intrigue me. He floats in
and out of Gainesville like pollen and
travels all around the goddamned world,
struggling to correct its cruel
injustices by day and telling really
bad, really politically incorrect jokes
by night with Ryan or some other
freak. That's all I have to say about
that. Steve, we will meet again. You
depressed me last time you were here by
saying, "This could be the last time we
ever see each other." You are wrong.
WRONG.
Gerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
grand?
It's unfortunate you won't be hanging
around NYC too much longer, but I
suppose the Motor City beckons with all
her might.
Then Africa, naturally . . .
frequently he is also drunkadeedon't.
about steve, but i could never capture
in words alone the awesomeness of a guy
whose best quote ever is probably "you
know what's fun? fun. hilarious fun?
better." steve and i met because we
were on the same three-year fellowship
which required us to be in swahili
class together on a near daily basis.
we were the worst two swahili students
ever; we frequently relied on the stock
answer "ndiyo! sana!" to any and all
questions posed to us. our friendship
was not cemented until year three, when
i lost my edge and thereby became
worthy of steve's time. for you see,
steve enjoys the drink, and when he
drinks he moves in the wrong
direction. we moved in together,
probably because his lease was expiring
and he's a very lazy lazy man, and he
knew noelle and i would find us all a
new home. and what a filthy, depraved,
nearly unlivable home it was. many
nights steve and i passed out together
on opposite ends of his couch with
tennenbaums or LOTR playing in the
background; equally often, i woke up to
find steve topless, hungover and
groaning on that same couch. it seems
weird now to watch notre dame games
without steve's forehead affixed to the
tv, with him eloquently and
descriptively screaming "RUN!" steve
came rushing home when i couldn't get
rid of coyote, internet-ed with me day
and night, gave up his malaise with me,
tried his best to cheer me up when i
was beyond sad, and co-hosted the
infamous super bowl turducken party
("all you need is a chicken, if you
already have a duck, and that duck's
inside a turkey!"). we once tried to
better our extremely unhealthy
lifestyle by eating a piece of fruit a
day, but after rushing to the gas
station around midnight for OJ and
raisenettes, we sensibly changed it to
eating some candy every day. you have
never met anyone who can sing gibberish
songs like steve, and it is always fun
to watch him stump starbucks employees
by ordering chocolate milk ("um...do we
even have that?"). he was widely known
for always being surrounded by hot
chicks wherever he went in
gainesville. i will miss steve very
much when he heads off to botswana.
but ignore that bit where steve claims
to study "micropolitics of blah blah
blah..." what steve really studies is
shopping malls.