paul, let it not be said that a perusal of your tesimonials is not unlike stepping into a time warp chamber in which a friendly scientist says, "Hello. Would you like to experience a bunch of shit that you thought you forgot about?" after he comes out of nowhere and takes you on a guided tour of said material
Paul didn't want to talk to me even though I was literally the only person helping him get his stuff back. Ha ha, Paul vom'd into a Duane Reade shopping bag.
When I'm kicking back with Pauly Smalls there's
some jivin' tunes on and the clink of Brooklyn
Lager bottles, the evenin' time is all crickets and
breezes from the side streets and he even lets
me tell a joke badly now and then. If he's feelin'
agreeable he might strum and hum me a little tune
and not complain about my broken string guitar.
Yup, with Pauly its good times.
During the same acid trip that Paul mentions
in his latest testimonial to me, Paul and I took
it upon ourselves to call up all of our friends'
voicemail boxes (they had all vacated the
campus for fall break) and leave them long
messages that we decided were to be "weather
reports." What weather was this you ask? Why
the weather in my carpet of course. Paul really
took to this craft, and worked then (as now)
well within the trope at hand. If you ever need
an expert opinion on upcoming swirls in your
upholstery, look no farther than the Itai on
this page.
rim jim jiggery/ rim jim jiggery/ rim jim jiggery
roo/ breaking it down for my homies and my
bitchez cuz i got shit else to do/ pauls got the
flava/ ya motha brings tha spice/ tricky p.
paulleus gonna turn tha ladies out nice/
make em say "ho"/ make em say "hey"/ ninja
master super blaster got the order of the
day/ it's ham on rye/ for five ninety nine/ and
don't forget ya box of ya cheap ass wine/
where tha bitchez at/ are ya panties soaked
girl/ cuz ya lookin at p. paulleus/ he makes
the honeyz toes curl
Paul, or "paul-paul" as he was
known in the days of his youth,
suffered a tragic loss early on with
the assassination of his father,
President Paulleus F. Smaldino III.
you may remember seeing him
saluting a casket in the media at
the--yes, yes, that was him! And that
was his father, President Smaldino
in there. You didn't know? It was.
You also didn't know there was a
President Smaldino? There also
was.
any time.
is hold out for five...
more...
minutes
some jivin' tunes on and the clink of Brooklyn
Lager bottles, the evenin' time is all crickets and
breezes from the side streets and he even lets
me tell a joke badly now and then. If he's feelin'
agreeable he might strum and hum me a little tune
and not complain about my broken string guitar.
Yup, with Pauly its good times.
tude like paul. spank mugs forever!
in his latest testimonial to me, Paul and I took
it upon ourselves to call up all of our friends'
voicemail boxes (they had all vacated the
campus for fall break) and leave them long
messages that we decided were to be "weather
reports." What weather was this you ask? Why
the weather in my carpet of course. Paul really
took to this craft, and worked then (as now)
well within the trope at hand. If you ever need
an expert opinion on upcoming swirls in your
upholstery, look no farther than the Itai on
this page.
brown and moved away from the africa
savannah to a dark room somewhere.
watch out, new york
roo/ breaking it down for my homies and my
bitchez cuz i got shit else to do/ pauls got the
flava/ ya motha brings tha spice/ tricky p.
paulleus gonna turn tha ladies out nice/
make em say "ho"/ make em say "hey"/ ninja
master super blaster got the order of the
day/ it's ham on rye/ for five ninety nine/ and
don't forget ya box of ya cheap ass wine/
where tha bitchez at/ are ya panties soaked
girl/ cuz ya lookin at p. paulleus/ he makes
the honeyz toes curl
known in the days of his youth,
suffered a tragic loss early on with
the assassination of his father,
President Paulleus F. Smaldino III.
you may remember seeing him
saluting a casket in the media at
the--yes, yes, that was him! And that
was his father, President Smaldino
in there. You didn't know? It was.
You also didn't know there was a
President Smaldino? There also
was.