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"v2.2 I'm not asking for help, I'm not asking for trouble.
The man on the radio just asked me, "What would you do for
an..."
More about Tarin
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Messaging Off[Restricted to Tarin's friends] |
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Occupation:
Vengadora, Squad Captain, Privateer, Art Pusher
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Hobbies and Interests:
the end of the world (either preventing or causing, depending on what side you're on), brushing my teeth, thanking people, dropping lightbulbs off tall buildings, carjackings, polio, bacon, social engineering, circus school, getting my blue belt, Fernet
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Favorite Books:
Last Book: The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle (Murakami) ...Austerlitz, Gravity's Rainbow, Borderliners, Infinite Jest, Slaughterhouse Five, Nine Stories
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Favorite Movies:
Last Movie: Harold and Maude. wowsa. American Astronaut, Pirates of the Caribbean, The Matrix, The Warriors, Amelie, Pi, Dog Day Afternoon, Time Bandits, Ferris Bueller, Willy Wonka, Crouching Tiger, movies that tell the truth and make me cry.
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Favorite Music:
KPOO, KALX, Pirate Cat Radio, God Speed You Black Emperor, Billy Nayer Show, PJ Harvey, Erin McKeown, Rube Waddell, Coachwhips, Kung Fu USA, Nate Denver's Neck, Zeppelin, Sabbath, Prince, The Brass Tax, DJ Lorin, anything pretty with a lot of bass
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Favorite TV Shows:
The Simpsons, X-Files, Get Smart. MUSIC (cont'd): Beck, Portishead, Tricky, weird locally produced musicals, The Slings, Diamond Galaxy, Missy Elliot, Nina Simone, Boswell Sisters, Noe Venable, Tom Waits, Elliot Smith, Tom Lehrer, Laurie Anderson, more
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About Me:
v2.2 I'm not asking for help, I'm not asking for trouble.
The man on the radio just asked me, "What would you do for
an extra hundred dollars?" Oh, wait, he was asking what I
would do *with* the money. Other than spend it, fucking
freak? What, would you like me to tear it up into little
pieces and roll chicken legs in it and fry them up and feed
them to my stupid neighbor with the big skateboard? You,
would, little coddle-midget. You're not getting your way
this time. You're getting *in* the way, which I'm trying to
tell you IS NOT THE FASTEST METHOD OF WINNING. If you stop
biting that girl she might stop kicking you.
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Who I Want to Meet:
PEOPLE WITH SMILES THAT LIGHT UP THE GENERAL VICINITY AND
MAKE MY INSIDE-OUT MELTY FEELING. viking warlords, ninjas,
astronauts, trash collectors, lonesome cowboys,
sous-chefs, knife sharpeners, pirates, ranchers. No haters.
I am a mental size queen. I have a minimum requirement for
the following: curiosity, empathy, humility, and
elasticity. Know where your towel is. The facts are not the
truth.
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How you're connected:
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Tarin is in your extended network |
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Tarin |
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way more of a prison way
but unlike the Golden Gate Bridge or
the cable cars, she will speak to you
if you say hello in a bar.
Spank and console. The mistress of the
boogie the shaker of the mop and soul.
Doom lady of fame "damn straight yo..."
the never-ending parade of hot Tarin
pictures. My favorite thing about Tarin
is the time she came out for drinks
even though she was detoxing. She sat
on a bench at Zeitgeist and bravely
(only a little regretfully) refused
pint after pint of cold frosty beer.
All the while smoking about five bowl
hits before running off to find her
favorite e toy for the party she was
going to. Hey. You detox your way.
Tarin detoxes her way.
seem a pitifully inadequate means of
rendering Tarin's charms. However I
will say this and I will say it anyway.
Tarin is like hell on wheels and I'm
talking about the good-bad hell not
the bad-bad hell. Hell on wheels
with a tricked out moster v-8 hemi, a
killer sound system, hot paint job,
super-stiff low-profile rubber and a
real soft comfortable leather bench
seat. Still with me? Convertible.
Shiny chrome that blinds your eyes
when the sun hits it. There's a tin
bucket full of ice, beer and good
tequila in the back seat. Need I
mention the long open highway that
beckons before you and the absence
of any law enforcement? Oh and
there's a magnum in the glove
compartment and a fat wad of $100
bills. If you do not understand then
this is not the ride you are looking for.
If you do then you will know this
already.
that's not just because the last time I
saw her she forced a gun in my
mouth with one hand and crushed
my left testicle into a bloody mess
with the other*. I'm not talking about
the I'm 5 years old and watching The
Exorcist, The Shining and Jacob's
ladder back-to-back or "Oww Fuck"
the great white shark just crunched
through my left femur and poking the
fucker in the eye and gills isn't
helping kind of scared. I'm talking
about the you are on your sixth shot
of tequila and the hot chick next to
you leers at you across the top of her
whiskey and says "trust me". Maybe
its because she knows kung fu
(whoaah) or maybe its because
she's channeling the spirits of Long
John Silver, Jack Kerouac and Vlad
the Impaler. I dunno. Seriously she
will chat you up, drink you under the
table, and kick you in the ass when
you start to pass out under said
table. Then when you wake up with
one smile she'll make you laugh and
want to do it all over again and again
(and again and again). More fun than
a weekend in Vegas with fat roll and
a death wish.
* I'm still waking funny but at least
now I know how important it is to
remembers that some people don't
like ice in their Jameson's and the
even more important truth that while
it is difficult to whistle dixie through
your nose when you have a hot gun
barrel in your mouth it is not only a)
possible, but b) essential to my
continuing survival and most
importantly c) real sexy. Thanks
Tarin.
the movie.
Tarin = pirateer meets kungfu ladymantis on
a nice glow stick ride.
She's the best cause she's the best!!!! "YAY"
is not already self evident? She is my Karaoke
muse, my lovin' spoonful o' sugar, she looks
great, and tastes even better, if it was legal I'd
batter her up, fry her in maple syrup, sprinkle
her with powdered sugar and walk around the
bar giving people just TINY nibbles of her so
they could be oh so jealous of my little slice o'
heaven...