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Claire Bohnengel
Messaging Off
[Restricted to Claire's friends]
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Interested In:
Friends, Activity Partners
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Member Since:
Jan 2004
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Hometown:
Sylvania, Ohio
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Company:
the Biblical Archaeology Society (totally normal)
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Claire's URL:
http://profiles.friendster.com/5022103
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Other education:
Notre Dame Academy, Kenyon College
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Occupation:
Assistant Editor
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Affiliations:
Aclands 107A, I Phelta Thi frasority
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What I enjoy doing:
reading, writing, word-a-day calendars, nuance, riding horses, outdoor showers, home videos, the days of yore, telling stories
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Favorite Books:
The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Beloved, Paradise, The Great Gatsby, The Sun Also Rises, Seabiscuit, short stories by Hemingway, Raymond Carver
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Favorite Movies:
The Last of the Mohicans, The English Patient, The Color Purple, Memento, In the Bedroom, Kenyon College admissions video circa 1997, COMPletely Annoying Spring Break 2002--a documentary by Erica and Claire, Barrett falls off my horse when he's 12
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Favorite Music:
classic rock and the more prurient fringes of that genre including Journey, REO Speedwagon, Meatloaf. also Martin Sexton, Jeff Buckley, and for some reason lately, Richard Marx, but you have to admit he's really got a lot of hits.
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Favorite TV Shows:
the uje (pronounced "yooj, " as in 'the usual'), also low-budget reality tv like the TLC Life Unscripted line-up and Emergency Vets. Nova.
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Zodiac Sign:
Pisces
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About Me:
My dad tends towards using the term "bitches" frequently in his speak.
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Who I Want to Meet:
Definitely people who hang their graduation tassels from their rearview mirror, Montenegrins, Robert Plant (please. I haven't seen him since that afternoon at Madame Toussaud's).
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Claire videotapes more stuff than any
other person I know. Not in a Paris
Hilton kind of way, more like those
guys from Jackass. Sadly, the daily
antics of Claire's comrades are in no
way marketable to the fickle,
prepubescent MTV audience. It is,
however, a delight to have footage of
the craziest, highest-on-jesus old
woman at a Bojangles Chicken on Sunday
you've ever seen in your whole life.
Seriously, she was rolling like they
had fit the holy trinity into a tab of
ecstasy or something...If I were to draft
a short list of my favorite people
ever; Claire would most certainly make
the cut. I imagine she would be
somewhere between Michael J. Fox and
Bobby Brown, who would be like one or
two slots ahead of the guy who played
Mr. Belvedere.
slap it. your mother and i didn't
raise you to be a sissy.
off NOW. all y'all bitches.
more?
cooler than her fab personality and
awe-inspiring work-ethic (that makes me
look real, real bad)--is her eyes. They
really do glow red. Some say it comes
with her supernatural powers; I think it
might have been exposure to depleted
uranium ammunition when she was doing
Special Ops in Iraq. She says it's just
a trick of the lighting, but she's
modest that way.
claire has a fetish for water bottles, speaks
eloquently in multiple languages, and swears
by led zeppelin. or however you spell it. there
are incriminating photos of claire floating
around somewhere involving a saddle, riding
crop, and boots and a college frosh, but we'll
let those slide. she's been a fabulous friend
and oh yeah, zab says hi.
claire bojangles is. for example,
take a look at the pictures she offers
us: one in which her eyes are
possessed by satan; one in which she
tries to aid a deer that is obviously
in the throes of a severe seizure; one
in which she gives some washed-up
hippie a blowjob onstage (at least let
him finish his version of blind
melon's "no rain!"). one part imp,
one part mother theresa for fauna, and
one part groupie, claire has it all.