The Greek god of gods, Zeus is possibly the most powerful of them all! He wields the thunderbolt, and rules the thunder and the sky. Zeus sits at Mount Olympus, home of the Greek pantheon, where he watches over the affairs of gods and men.

As a noble hare you are well respected, adored even. The opposite sex finds you irresistible; you are quite the charmer. In addition to being a lover, however, you are also a philosopher. You are deeply familiar with the mysteries of this world, and so you are a great resource for advice.

No one cares if you're smart or not. That's because you're a pirate! We all love pirates! They speak funny and they dress funny. Whether they're moronic or not, pirates are a good time.

Murder is the oldest of all sins. You are a passionate felon. You don't kill for the money; you do it for the pleasure. There is nothing like stabbing a victim in the chest to really get your heart going in the morning. It's better than a cup of coffee!

Perhaps the most insidious of all STDs, it can be spread with only a kiss. Or, if you're into that sort of thing, oral contact with other, more intimate, parts. It's not life threatening, but the sores can be an embarrassment to those who are infected.

You will be happy without money. You will realize that money isn't necessary for a happy life. Good friends and good times are the true keys to success.

Nobody knows who invited you to the party, or if you even were invited. But, you are here now, and you are drinking the beer, trying to hook up with someone, and generally being sketchy. We have to respect you for being that guy.

You're the bomb! You're so hot. You're on fire! (or soon will be, when you explode and stuff). You're crazy, a little violent, and a lot of fun. You're wild.

You are a rascal, and a social deviant. You are happiest when you're causing trouble, and pissing off the authorities. A cherry bomb down the toilet or tagging your name? Who knows what you are going to do next!

You aren't in love, but you aren't lonely either. You're at peace with yourself. You're comfortable being alone, but if you find someone special, you're willing to explore the possibility of love. You are a strong person indeed.

You're not gay. You're straight. Why do you need a quiz to tell you that? Are you insecure about your sexuality?

You aren't fat. You're buff! Your muscular body drives them all crazy with lust. Your strong arms are helpful when moving automobiles and other large objects, and your strong legs propel you quickly towards any goal. You're awesome.

Your corrosive personality has made you a few enemies in your time. Even your friends can find you a bit disagreeable. At some point one of these enemies (or friends) will become so tired of your antics that he will poison you. Cool.