-
-
-
-
Occupation:
Dodgin' & Weavin'
-
Hobbies and Interests:
Wandering around aimlessly, explaining the obvious, kissing puppies
-
Favorite Books:
Tao of Hate
-
Favorite Movies:
Ummmm, not any of those Pedro Almodovar flicks, you fucking hipsters.
-
Favorite Music:
In no particular order whatsoever...The Police, Prince, Mike Patton, Jehu, Pitchfork, Hot Snakes, The Melvins, AC/DC, Superdrag, Aesop Rock, Minor Threat, Fugazi, The Pixies, Jejune, Kool Keith, Karp, Pharcyde, old L.L., Jesus Lizard, Pavement, Dancehall, Soca, Built to Spill, The Slackers, Buju Banton, Beenie Man, Nice &; Smooth, Eric B. &; Rakim, The Pharcyde, Mr. Lif, TITR, Mission of Burma, RJ, Dibbs, Timbaland, The Rentals, Hepcat, Guns N' Roses, Aerosmith, Neurosis, Seaweed, Isis, The Cure, Ike &; Tina, Johnny Guitar Watson, Parliament, Old 97's, Weezer, Poison, Special Ed, Propaghandi, Justin Hinds, Horace Andy, 3rd Bass, Smokey Robinson, Dismemberment Plan, Jay-Z, Bootsy Collins, Poor Righteous Teachers, Culture Club, Van Halen, The Stones, a whole bunch of other shit!
-
Favorite TV Shows:
Ali G, Mr. Show, SCTV, Oz, Law & Order, Food Network
-
Zodiac Sign:
Sagittarius
-
About Me:
I enjoy long walks on the beach with monkeys & puppies.
-
Who I Want to Meet:
I'm not feeling very friendly these days.
-
|
 |
How you're connected:
| You |
 |
Lynn is in your extended network |
|
Lynn |
-
-
|
she keeps sending me links to friendster profiles of strangers who, in turn, stalk me once they see i've been snooping on their pages.
she is a very mean girl.
it's far FAR away from any "birthday"
parties!
drink with Lynn, you'll talk, she'll
smoke, you'll bum from her pack, she'll
smile, you'll forget all about that
bullshit week you just had.
And then Lynn will get a faraway look
in her eye, and she'll murmur something
unitelligible. You'll ask her what's
wrong, she'll pull back to attention
and then she'll tell you that it's
nothing. She was just thinking about
Ali G--"Sasha" as she prefers to call
him.
"Did you know Sasha likes to drink
Irish Whiskey?"
"No Lynn, I didn't."
"Did you know Sasha drives a Burgundy
1986 Dodge Caravan that has gold 24"
rims, except in the back where they're
like 36 inches?"
"Get the fuck out here."
"No, I shit you not! This fucking dude
rolls in a soccer-mom-mobile pimped out
like Don Magic Juan's bathroom."
You'll both laugh hysterically, take
another sip of your drinks, and forget
about the bullshit month you each had.
I just wanna jump inside it and swim
laps.
we being corporeal marine mammal,
Ludwig wittgentstein, karl popper,
lynn, and myself among others. It
happened that corporeal marine mammal
and myself surreptitiously encountered
an engaging lecture by the
aforementioned Wittgenstein. By
surreptitiously, I mean that we
intentionally lied as to our
credentials, then upon authorities
discovering said prevarication, later
disguised our persons as that what
befits decorative flora, as a common
ceramic vase for myself and as his want
an ornate Attic vase detailing Ajax
conversing with Athena concerning his
crimson sword for corporeal marine
mammal. Ludwig puffed his chest while
prattling about the linguistic nature
of philosophy, all the while Popper
seethed and writhed in his chair,
either from disagreement or as I
assume, a most bloody and irritating
hemorrhoid. Popper stood, to articulate
his disgust either with his discomfited
bottom or Ludwig's pomposity he
ornamented with word. The crisply
articulated blather abated as Popper,
ashen and squinting, shuffled and
teetered from left foot to right,
scratched himself then exclaimed, God
damned Ass. At this point Wittgenstein
grabbed a fire poker, as welcomes any
fireplace, strutted toward Popper
brandishing his flame stoker while
screaming unintelligible curses upon
all ears. Popper, fidgeting, wriggling
his inflamed bottom, too amplified his
tone as befits those enraged. Corporeal
marine mammal and I snickered our
childish delight at their vitriol and
provocative invitations. The two
seeming set for battle, neared closer
another until one heard a clearing of
throat. Lynn, a quiet ahem, silenced
the conflagration. Ludwig and Karl
stared at her, she stood, glared and
said, "Ludwig I'll show you pain and
private language, (referring to his
essay) then turning in kind toward
Karl, "You'll scientifically discover
the logic of my foot in your ass
(referring to his opus). Dear reader,
many believe it were the want and
appreciation of Bertrand Russell but it
were for the approval and affection of
Lynn these two giants reared crimson.
no way ma'am.
with my shit.
hard-assed testimonial, since I've known Lynn
for about 426 years (I'm rounding up). Lynn, a
practical girl, and I met while I was
experiencing a spilling problem while holding
a bottle upside down. Smart as she is, she told
me to put a cork in it... We've been friends
ever since...