Dave Croatto's Profile

      Dave Croatto
      Male, 30, In a Relationship, New York, NYMore
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      Testimonials and Comments for Dave

      • Danielle
      • Posted
      • If you make Dave tolerate you for long enough, eventually he will reward your persistence with 18th-century lady writer action figures and stills from your favorite film by your favorite neurotic filmmaker . . . just totally out of the blue! As if his friendship weren't already better than a HS penny social door prize.
      • Dyana
      • Posted
      • Dave is rumored to bring good fortune and babies in the spring. He is also Lithuania's national bird.
      • Dyana
      • Posted
      • Dave is a terrible person. I started a support group called "Victims of Dave Anonymous." We meet the first Thursday of every month and go bowling. It is wildly successful.
      • Danielle
      • Posted
      • When at a concert or other general
        admission venue, Dave always makes
        sure that those shorter than he is can
        see the stage. Now that's a gentleman.
      • Danielle
      • Posted
      • If you ever need live technical support
        while you're in the middle of a bidding
        war on ebay, Dave Croatto is your man.
      • Danielle
      • Posted
      • I can say with no doubts that by viewing
        Dave's profile, you have come one step
        closer to knowing the once and future
        organ playing king of North America.
        Possibly all of the Americas.
      • Adnan
      • Posted
      • Dave's immeasurable talent pulls a joke
        out of any given situation, context,
        circumstance. Anywhere, anytime.
        AND he is found funny by just about
        everyone from the very second they
        meet him.
        I once laughed my head off upon hearing
        his story in which a character says:
        "This falafel's awful."
        Yes, even the stupid stuff like that
        magically gets a much better score
        when in Dave's hands. Hey, it is all
        about transforming turds into gems.
      • Danielle
      • Posted
      • Dave hates the mandate to have fun.
      • Danielle
      • Posted
      • Dave's the type of person who will give
        you his only mermaid to keep your
        giraffe company. Do with this
        information what you will.
      • Danielle
      • Posted
      • Update: Since Julia Child's demise,
        Dave has assumed the throne as world's
        best pancake flipper.

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