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College/University:
Brown University, Attended 1996 - 2001, Class of 2001, Bachelor's Degree, Biology
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Occupation:
Ivory Tower Gatekeeper
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Affiliations:
www.mistersoccer.net; www.brownmenssoccer.blogspot.com
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Hobbies and Interests:
Semi-Pro Soccer, Reading, Writing, 'Rithmetic (Puzzles & Strategic Games), Documenting, Recording Classical & Acoustic Guitar, Freestyle Cooking, Becoming Handy
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Favorite Books:
My Summer 2007 Reads: Norwegian Wood (Murakami), Nature Girl (Hiaasen), The Zero Game (Meltzer), Kite Runner
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Favorite Movies:
The Traverse City Film Festival
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Favorite TV Shows:
Arrested Development, The Office (BBC), South Park, EPL, NHL, Daily Show, Colbert, Local News Channel 12 Futurecast with Live Pinpoint Doppler Radar Tracking Weather Right Down to Your Street
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Zodiac Sign:
Libra
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About Me:
Member of the Midwestern diaspora
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How you're connected:
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Anders is in your extended network |
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Anders |
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crime of moral turpitude. He was the first guy
possessing such looks as good as his that I
allowed my girlfriend to crush on. To the best of my
knowledge, she never consummated that crush,
but Anders is full of surprises. A true 20th century
piano genius. Who knows what the 21st century
has in store for this cat?
all-american values. if you know him
you probably understand what I'm
talking about. While the aloof 90's
sent many of us wading into morally
ambiguous swamps and cycling
through space-aged identity loops
(or was that just me?), Anders never
let go of what his mom and dad
taught him back in the woods of
Traverse City, Michigan. That's
because it's served him well on his
various missions. He's actually sort
of like the hobbit, exept
scandanavian, which I guess would
make him more like the elves. Yeah,
just think about how everyone loves
legalus, the way he provides such
pleasant company, knows how to get
the job done, and is really good at
soccor. That's pretty much how
Anders is.
known sharif a while, and he's pretty
cool!
i was on leave from the Ottawa National
Health Institute doing a residency as
head researcher at Celera Genomics'
CPCS 205 lab at the NIH.
a lunch-time discussion with an old
college chum from the nearby molecular
biology lab turned heated, and before i
knew it i was writing grant proposals
to the CIA, and getting a surgical team
together. selling the bigwigs in the
BlackOps community on what we meant to
do was the easy part. finding the right
host--someone that could survive our
deadly deluge of corrective gene
infusions during embryonic development--
that was were it got tricky.
it took us months of failure; and left
us awash in hundreds of dead test
embroyos that would develop EITHER
intelligence quotients in the low
300's, OR superdense, actin-heavy
muscle fiber enhanced strength levels
on par with a rhino; but never both.
then, one calm day in september, with
the Council for Responsible Genetics
breathing down our necks, and numerous
key senators in the latest
congressional oversight committee
making noises about cutting our
funding, the boys in screening came
calling with sweet relief. a delightful
young couple in north michigan, with
genes that matched our predictive
heuristics perfectly, reported on their
1977 tax returns that they were
planning on starting a family.
two 200cc tranquilizer darts, one (very
hush-hush) operation and nine months
later mark and anne-marie kelto gave
birth to a squinting, happy baby boy.
all with a little unseen help from
celera genomics and uncle sam. they say
that the flame which burns the
brightest burns the shortest. after 25
years of mr. kelto, we at celera would
beg to disagree: it's all a matter of
what wax you use. now, if i could only
get that sore loser in molecular
biology to pay me my five bucks.