Embittered Lush

Queensbury Shs, Attended 1994 - 1998, Class of 1998

Queensbury High School

State University of New York - College at Fredonia, Attended 1998 - 2002, Class of 2002, Bachelor's Degree, BFA (big f***ing a**hole) in Acting

bon vivant/aesthete/wit/box office biotch

AA [eventually]

not answering my phone, not calling/e-mailing people back, drinking in the middle of the day [or morning], finding others' achilles' heels and gnawing until i get tears/blood [whichever comes last], pushing buttons and boundaries, reinstating verbal dexterity, wordplay, and wit to the everyday lexicon, making friendly enemies, toilet humor and unique combonations of obscenities, hurling epithets [racial, sexual, and otherwise], ruling with a stylishly-baubled gold-plated iron fist, sexual harassment of both males and females [including, but not limited to: nipple tweaking, cupping of breasts and packages, making out {tongue only}, and the occasional ass grab that slips a finger into someone's brown-eyed girl], pushing buttons, finding the meanest way to say something, repeating the same information over and over again, overanalizing things/being neurotic in general, being an enabler/enablee.

hmmm...well i read just about anything i can get my hands on, so here's a list of recent reads and favorites...Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil, 1929, Gone With the Wind, The Witches of Eastwick, Middlesex, The Devil in the White City, The Godfather, Candide, Tales of the City, The Other Boleyn Girl, The Hours, Valley of the Dolls, The Family, Save Karyn, Breakfast At Tiffany's, As Meat Loves Salt, Harry Potter [Goblet of Fire was my favorite], His Dark Materials Trilogy, This Way to the Gas Ladies and Gentlemen, Ender's Game, She's Come Undone, I Know This Much Is True, The Rules of Attraction, Another Country, The Secret History, The Little Friend, Naked, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Holidays On Ice, Glamorama, American Psycho, The Alienist, The Angel of Darkness, The Weekly World News...i have an enormous collection of plays that i am slowly working my way through...i have a book buying problem that i am in the midst of trying to curb, and not having the greatest success with...

Auntie Mame, Young Frankenstein, Network, Farenheit 9/11, Todo Sobre Mi Madre, Death Becomes Her, The Color Purple, Muppets From Space, Monty Python And The Holy Grail, A Mighty Wind, Drop Dead Gorgeous, Skidoo, The Exorcist, Fargo, Troop Beverly Hills, The Money Pit, The 'Burbs, Desk Set, Postcards From The Edge, Dangerous Liasons, Billy Elliot, Elizabeth, Dead Poets Society, The Godfather Trilogy, Goddess of Love [yes, the Vanna White one], Kiss of the Spider Woman, Hable Con Ella, Y tu Mama Tambien, 8 1/2, My Best Friend's Wedding, Billy's Hollywood Screen Kiss, Torch Song Trilogy, Freaks, The Goonies, Barbarella, Far From Heaven...this list could go on forever.

the AWESOMETASTICS!, memberme, wing [i had a rishion of wrove?], shirley q. liquor [how's you durrin'?], dusty springfield, will young, teddy thompson, rufus wainwright, scissor sisters, black eyed peas, aretha franklin, guster, annie lennox, madonna, eminem, dixie chicks, beatles, fleetwood mac, rolling stones, jazz, 60's, 70's, the occasional 80's [think culture club and wham!, not poison and great white], well-put-together movie soundtracks, i love me some pop tart princesses every once in a while [britney, christina, justin], classical, and of course, where would a mo be without his enormous selection of musical theatre cd's?

Arrested Development [RIP], Grey's Anatomy [oh George!], Desperate Housewives, Brothers & Sisters, Seinfeld, The Simpsons, That 70's Show, Six Feet Under, Lazy Town [mesmerizing and terrifying all at once], Will and Grace [when the writing isn't shit], Golden Girls, Designing Women, It's A Living!, Murphy Brown, just about every self and home improvement show known to mankind ...i am a huge fan of the history channel/pbs and all sorts of boring fact-finding and factually-based programming, the occasional episode of The Parkers has been known to make me fall off the couch.

Aquarius

[hopefully this doesn't come across as the ususal masterbatory bullshit that you read {it's hard to come across as objective without making yourself sound like a total herb, but whatever}]...i'm a mass of contradictions. i love collecting people to add to my menagerie of freaks, geeks, and crackheads. i'm surrounded by an overwhelmingly pungent cloud of lunacy, debauchery, and gin. i love laughter [my own and especially others'] and have been known to cry at an occasional episode of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition [i know, i know]. i'm always looking for new music to add to the soundtrack of my life. i laugh at completely inappropriate times. i am a high-strung hippie. i put my cd's in alphabetical order. i can never remember names. i believed in santa until i was 12. i have no coordination whatsoever. i hate surprise parties. i tend to be slightly over the top. i'm grade d ground beef in a sea of surf and turf. i never make it past the third date. i love ordering office supplies. i'm a pretty good guy [who doesn't have their faults, really?], brutally honest [occasionally to a fault], relatively intelligent, and willing to do just about anything to make someone laugh. i've been in career limbo for a while now, but i've started getting myself back on track as far as what i want to do with my life to make a difference in the lives of those around me and in the greater scheme of things. i'm a pretty goddamn good cook [though not much of a baker]. i have a huge weakness for dorks. i'm firecely loyal. i try to see things from as many perspectives as possible. i'm a little frigid at first, mostly because i'm painfully shy. i have been known to snap on occasion, but i pretty much let out my steam and forget about it 10 minutes later. i do not like raw tomatoes, any kind of melons, grapefruits, pineapples, and am not a huge fan of bananas. i keep my closet and dresser drawers meticulously organized so i feel better about other areas of my life...that aren't so organized.

people who aren't afraid to wear their faults as a badge of honor. the exception to the rule. a rapier wit with a heart of [tarnished] gold [or at least gold plate]. people who've seen barbarella, das sexy rockmusikal. anyone who doesn't have a problem with interpretive dance in public places, boys [well, men, preferably] who don't have more than one half naked picture on here.

...and madeline ashton.