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Richie Townsend

Male, 28, Single, Chicago, ILMore

Richie's Friends (82)

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Testimonials and Comments for Richie

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Sonja
Posted
im gonna start a new trend where we give each other our first testimonial in years

Katie
Posted
RICHIE TOWNSEND
is the coolest name ever.

Candy
Posted
Hi! My name is Haywood Jablomee

Laura
Posted
"don't talk to me like you don't know
me" man, were you shitty or what....
you owe me so much jameson. by the way
jameson doesn't have an "s" on the end
of it, asshole.

Jen
Posted
Richie (aka. Horsesnatch)!!! You are
such a sweetheart when you want to
be. I miss being ridiculously drunk
with you or just bithcin' about all
the stupid things we get ourselves
into. I'll hopefully see you soon
though. PS. Try to control that drool
hun:)

Eric
Posted
R-ightous
I-diots
C-leverly
H-ide
I-nside
E-lephants

Jess
Posted
richie -- stop making friends. you're
catching up to me... and thats not
allowed.

Kyle
Posted
I like you and I like your butt. I
will see it/you again soon I hope.

Joey
Posted
Richie is like a gun: long , hard and
voluptuous to the touch of his pants.
Nevermind formalities, Richie will fuck you
hard! I'm not just talking 'bout the ladies
neither, fuck no motherfuck!, i'm talking
about the kids! That's right, Richie digs
those stone cold grooves of underage girls.
or as he calls them "evidence." Fuck
parental consent or even a sign of
breathing, Richie is the plumber for that
leaky pipe, and by pipe i mean vagina.
Richie likes to skydive, but not from a plane
or even ahigh-minded cliff. Richie likes to
skydive in the skies of friendship!!! He can
jump to new hights in the manner of perhaps
a puppy licking your lips or perhaps a
handshake, not too hard, not too gay, but the
kind of awkward inbetweenness that comes
from being a shut in. Richie likes food of the
"orient" as he tends to call it. Sweet and
Sour, General Tso's, Hot and Sour are not
only some sweetass dishes in Richie's
head, but also some great adverbs to
describe himself!!!!! Richie is also a bike
rider. God knows why he wears those oh so
skimpy black bike pants and ironic t-shirts
that insist he is with stupid, but god bless
men who still consider it necessary to ride
phallic minded, rock hard and
uncomfortable seats. Richie is also a mean
conversationalist, and the funny thing is,
he's always right!!! Even if you know for a
fact that Richard Nixon was the president of
the USA, Richie knows that the correct fact
of the matter is that he was his best friend in
summer camp for two years, helping him
nurse cock bites from bees and other such
mishaps that come along with sticking your
dick in bushes way too close to pots of
boiling hot gruel and per chance, on those
rare mornings, drrrty rice. Leave it to Richie
to play the fiddle as well. By that i mean take
you (man or non-man) out for dinner, hire a
barbershop quartet and then leave after
rather awkward silences that would normally
constitute some form of conversation.
Basically, Richie is good at hugging and no
matter what, you are always at cock level
with him. Take it from me, you'll be in awe of
his rainbow-glistened friendship everytime
you walk out the door and realize you are
alone in the world of bigotry and Nazis. Also,
Richie once dated a cripple he lovingly
nicknamed "Funny Legs." What a fuckin'
charmer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (p.s. he also thinks you are
hot!!!!!!!!!!)